The holidays are a time for families, friends, and co-workers get together to celebrate, often by giving one another a Christmas gift. When a loved gives you a gift, it’s important to be grateful for what you’re given. However, in marriage gifts are generally supposed to be unique and thoughtful. As such, one woman turned to Reddit, subreddit AITA, when she stumbled upon her husband’s Christmas list. Discovering the item next to her name was underwhelming.
Discovering a Disappointing Christmas Gift
An anonymous woman shared her story on Reddit in which she explained that she wasn’t feeling very excited about the Christmas gift she would be receiving from her husband. In the post she explained that she and her husband have separate budgets. They also make their own decisions regarding a Christmas gift for their loved ones. Next, she explained that her husband bought lavish gifts for the people on his list. Some examples include a $600.00 watch for his co-worker, a bracelet for his sister-in-law, and $900.00 workout gear for a friend. However, when she got to her name, she was stunned to find her Christmas gift was a kitchen spoon set. Stainless-steel and costing a little over $20.00.
“I was too shocked to ignore this, and I had a confrontation with him about it. He argued that A. It’s his money he’s the one paying so I should not control that. And B. His coworkers/friends are important to him, and he’s known them for ages. C. He said a gift should be appreciated no matter what it cost.” She disclosed. Continuing on she explained, “I argued that he was disrespecting me and dismissing my feeling with the gift he chose to get me not to mention that I spend a lot of money for his gifts to buy him his favorite shoe/gaming brands but he got upset and said I was acting like an ungrateful, spoiled brat and urged me to get rid of this attitude and accept what I’m giving. The argument got worse, and we stopped talking to each other.”
Turning to Others for Consoling
Lastly, she explained that her husband told her, she was overreacting. She then turned to the wisdom of Reddit users, wondering if she did in fact overreact. Some people responded with suggestions to return his gift and get him something less thoughtful/expensive in return. Others were quick to point out that al it’s not the cost of the Christmas gift that matters. Also, noting the situation would be different if the husband had gotten something “inexpensive”, yet still meaningful. Meanwhile, others were quick to see that perhaps his wife isn’t as high on his list of priorities as she should be.
Another offered a possible scenario in which the spoon set wasn’t her actual intended Christmas gift. “Info: did he actually buy you the spoon set, or was it just on the list? Is it possible the list is just a decoy to throw you off?” The questioned. In response, another user pointed out that the way he spoke to his wife wasn’t acceptable.
“Forks. Get him forks, as in “fork you“.” One commentor shared jokingly. “Dude is either cheating, doesn’t care about her, or seriously faking her out on her present. That price difference is insane.” Declared another.
“I wonder how the friend and coworker will react to their enormous gifts. I’d feel so awkward getting something that expensive from anyone besides my family,” another thoughtfully chimed in, continuing, “even then, I’d feel inadequate if I didn’t get them something as expensive,”
All in all, there wasn’t much division on the matter. Most everyone agreed, the wife was entitled to a more well thought out Christmas gift. Although this post was shared 2 years ago, and it’s unknown whether or not that was in fact her real Christmas gift, it does bring up a valid question. Was she being ungrateful or a “spoiled brat” for reacting the way she did? Or is the content of a Christmas gift just as important as the idea of being thought of in the first place?
Importance of Gratitude
Unsurprisingly, the answer is circumstantial. For example, if someone who doesn’t have a lot of money or has a health condition that eats most of their annual income, then an inexpensive gift should be appreciated because, “it’s the thought that counts”. The same is true for a gift from a child, or one that is home made because there was time and energy put into the Christmas gift. Moreover, it seems there are many different reasons for the motivation behind giving a gift that range from “genuine gift giving” to giving for “show”. Meaning that while some people put a lot of thought into the Christmas gift they give, others will use it as a control tactic or a power move to show that they’re better off than others. In these cases, it might be okay to question whether or not a Christmas gift is appropriate.
On the other hand, some people are just bad at giving gifts. For instance, someone who feels shy, or self-conscious may over think the Christmas gift, second guessing whether their ideas would be well received.
Christmas Gift Ideas
However, in relationships, especially those that are very personal or intimate, giving gifts is an integral part of making someone feel special. Therefore, it’s important to overcome these challenges. Luckily, it’s astonishingly simple to do so. A gift can be as simple as a few favorite items like snacks, beauty products, or themed knickknacks in a decorative basket, or as large as a weekend getaway. Some other ideas for those struggling to find the perfect Christmas gift may also include DIY crafts, like homemade ornaments, snow globes, bath soak, or drink mixes like spiced cider and hot chocolate bombs. Hint, these can all be purchased if you’re not the “crafting” type.
Finding the perfect Christmas gift can be overwhelming, and in some cases like this Reddit story, can be done incorrectly. The best overall tactic is to be as thoughtful and personal as possible.